Wednesday, January 19, 2011
God Said No
My mother's heart was so broken, I just knew I would never be the same when I heard God say no. But in that same instant I understood what Mary must have felt seeing her beloved sons hands tied to the cross as my sons hands were tied to the bed. I could not stop the tears. I had asked God to give me the strength to be strong. When I found my self understanding and submitting to those that were in charge and had the wisdom we all had prayed for, I began to see what God was doing. He said no but I have a gift for you. When they took the ventilator off we were sure he would not be able to speak and would be in pain, how ever, Tim said "that feels so good". He began to sing and laugh, and talk to every one. He talked to Renita, and she just hugged him. His daughter was so thrilled to be able to really love and talk to him. His dad and I stood at the foot of his bed and he said "mom" and nodded his head at his dad. He spent 4 hours just talking and loving on family and friends. This was so unexpected. It was about 6:00 when he went into lung failure and began to have so much pain. He said,"mom" he knew I would do some thing, and I did. He had to be sedated and Renita his wife said, she knew this was the last he would know us. God said no but I will give you this precious moment... Joyce, wife mother, grandmother & great grandmother.
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I cannot know the pain & great loss of losing a child like u are going through, sister & brother in law, but I do feel the pain of losing some one very close to me. I have loved Tim from the time I even had to carry him screaming & kicking to take his nap. I always have enjoyed the times ,though short, that we got to spend together. The summer I spent up there with u guys , I had some wonderful times with Tim & I will remember & treasure them. He is with his Lord now & in a much better place. We will all be together again one day & it will be a joyous time for all. His Grampa & Gramma & Uncle Frank will watch over him til then. Love you & hope to see u soon. God Bless, sister Gerie
ReplyDeleteDear Aunt Joyce and Uncle Jack and Robin and Tom,Renita, John and I are here each day heavy in heart and cannot begin to realize the missing of Tim and the pain of loss of him to all of you. Although much of our family has had large gaps of time lost in years past, I do remember him as a child, a young man, and as I last saw him, a gentle person as I spoke with him.
ReplyDeleteYou knew your son as only you could more than anyone and it is that precious connection which holds memories and love. How terribly hard and painful.
It is not natural for our children to leave us first,and that, we cannot bare at any time because of all that Love. We know that your boy is with God, and he is with those who we love as well. May this great Love comfort him and both of you as well with assurance and peace.
We will be with you in thought and Love.
God bless you all, John and Valene